Two days ago marked a year of graduating from college. The first year went by rather quickly. Too quick. On the same day, I received an email from UWM tech notifying me the deletion of my D2L account. Since I’m no longer an active student for 2 months, my D2L account is to be considered deleted. This makes me so sad. I spent 6 fucking years at UWM, endless hours working on projects, laughing with friends on stupid videos, and sipping on bitter coffee to stay awake.
College really shaped me into the person that I needed to be. Not only did it prepare me for a career, but I grew a thicker skin, I picked up social cues faster, I met a diverse of friends, I first traveled internationally, got my first credit card, bought a car, dealt with fuckboys, learned how to be a better cook, and so much more. It was extremely hard for me to grow up like that in college but I pushed through. I had nothing else to fall back on if I went back home. I made it a mission to complete college and I could not wait to graduate. Just like any other graduates, I am glad to be leaving school for good but I will never forget what college did to me.
So deleting D2L also meant erasing a part of how my life really began at 20. This is why this blog is much needed. I need to record all the things that I will continue to do in my life on here. My goals, desires, milestones, achievements, failures, transitions, success, open discussions, inspiration, and connection. Right now, I can only keep working forward and be grateful in the present.
The only body part to call fat: the booty
I don’t think I draw enough guys. So here’s one. Next time, I’ll try to draw a more happy male.
Lately, I’ve been stressed about my student loans. It’s almost close to 6 figures, and I wish I would have gone for something else besides library school. There, I said it. I regret going to library school. If I knew it would’ve taken this long to become a librarian then I wouldn’t have signed up for this. I’m so irritated I even signed up for a gofundme account but then deleted it. No one will support that. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a law-abiding citizen who makes payments on time, but the interest keeps accruing. I’m barely getting paid, hell I’m not even in middle class. I’m right above poverty. Right now, I’m keeping my head above waters but all of my spending’s have been cut down to basically the essentials to survive.
I should mention I don’t regret going to school at all. It provided the foundation to help me to be aware, educated, and to validate myself when I couldn’t do so back with my dysfunction family. It’s just…I wish I had a mentor to help me with this stuff back in college. I’ve now found the confidence to really believe in myself and I want to pursue art as a second career. I plan to sell art stuff online in the future, but for now, my dreams are at a full stop.
Kids, don’t go to college unless you have your finances figured out. Don’t attend college unless you can get a free ride. Don’t take out loans. Did you know? Pornhub has a $25,000 scholarship for underrepresented women in science, technology, engineering, and mathematics (STEM)? I don’t care if you need to strip your way through college or if you started at a community college. Take all the damn time you need, but don’t give up. Apologies on the rant…
I think the anime community might have second hand embarrassment but I don’t care. Just know I wish I could be half as good as them. Or you.